Lightning (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
soundandfury) wrote2012-06-14 11:36 am
soundandfury) wrote2012-06-14 11:36 am
Entry tags:
Memory 04 // Significant Negative
Significant Negative: "Don't make her suffer" [6m23s-8m30s]
GAME: 117; Mother flower symbolism game
FORM: Wood Sorrel flower; 4/5 uses (self, itachi)
Just say it! Any L'cie-- anyone who might ever become a l'cie -- should just be wiped off the face of Cocoon!
...It's people like you that started the Purge in the first place.
Summary:
While exploring the Vestige, Sahz asks Lightning again why she's doing this-- Lightning tells him her sister is a Pulse l'cie, and has been taken captive by the fal'cie, but she intends to find and save her. Sahz questions her more and Lightning admits she doesn't know her sister's Focus -- the task a l'cie is given when a fal'cie claims them -- because she never asked. They are interrupted by the arrival of pretty awful looking monsters, who are less interested in attacking and more just stumbling around being miserable. Sahz explains that any l'cie who doesn't complete their focus will turn into one of those-- and even if they do complete it, they wont ever be human again; they will stay a slave, forever. This clearly upsets Lightning, and Sahz instructs her to not make her sister suffer. Lighting shoves him violently and yells at him, then stalks away.
Effects &c:
Ugh there is so much guilt and misery and anger in this memory, as well as a lot of just... internal conflict. Lightning is pretty miserable over not having asked her sister's focus--since completing her focus would at least keep Serah from becoming a monster--and therefore not being able to help her complete it. Lots and lots of guilt and self-hatred. And she's angry at the fal'cie, and angry at Sazh (though Sazh is only voicing what a majority of the citizens of Cocoon feel)(she's mad at them, too) and focussing on that anger is easier than thinking.
The problem is that Lightning is facing a pretty bleak situation here, and there is not an easy solution. Obviously, she wants to find and save her sister, no matter what. But this is pretty clearly easier said than done, and Lightning is a very practical person -- shouting empty, optimistic promises is the sort of thing that pisses Lightning off. So she can say she will save her sister... but what is she actually supposed to do? So she just has to... focus on one part at a time-- the easy part: find her. Serah is missing, Lightning will find her. That's as far ahead as she can let herself think. Any further than that and she runs up against the truth of everything Sazh is saying -- Serah can't ever be human again; Serah might turn into a monster; Serah will live her life as a slave -- as well as the 'truth' that a l'cie is a danger to anyone around it, not only because they are clearly the enemies of Cocoon, but because they can contaminate anyone else around them, and so the military will hunt them down and remove them.
SOLUTIONS ARE KIND OF THIN ON THE GROUND. So she lashes out at the people around her and bottles up her feelings and soldiers onward.
--Effects and anger and confusion and guilt and anger! She knows more things about the world now but she's not really going to think about those things too hard, because thinking about them is too painful and difficult.
--Serah ;;
--This also puts her in an interesting position re: Emerald's developing new policy regarding death games. Because obviously she's got a lot of anger and disdain for the idea of thoughtlessly protecting yourself and sacrificing others for your own safety all of a sudden... but also it's equally balanced against the idea of ignoring difficult choices and making things easier on yourself -- which is kind of how she sees Emerald's sacrifice policy. Her refusal to give up or even entertain the idea of giving up in a hopeless situation also just got ramped up dramatically... so ultimately she's still determined to not die--she'll just. I don't know she just has so many feelings.
tl;dr: she just has so many feelings. None of them are good.
GAME: 117; Mother flower symbolism game
FORM: Wood Sorrel flower; 4/5 uses (self, itachi)
Just say it! Any L'cie-- anyone who might ever become a l'cie -- should just be wiped off the face of Cocoon!
...It's people like you that started the Purge in the first place.
Summary:
While exploring the Vestige, Sahz asks Lightning again why she's doing this-- Lightning tells him her sister is a Pulse l'cie, and has been taken captive by the fal'cie, but she intends to find and save her. Sahz questions her more and Lightning admits she doesn't know her sister's Focus -- the task a l'cie is given when a fal'cie claims them -- because she never asked. They are interrupted by the arrival of pretty awful looking monsters, who are less interested in attacking and more just stumbling around being miserable. Sahz explains that any l'cie who doesn't complete their focus will turn into one of those-- and even if they do complete it, they wont ever be human again; they will stay a slave, forever. This clearly upsets Lightning, and Sahz instructs her to not make her sister suffer. Lighting shoves him violently and yells at him, then stalks away.
Effects &c:
Ugh there is so much guilt and misery and anger in this memory, as well as a lot of just... internal conflict. Lightning is pretty miserable over not having asked her sister's focus--since completing her focus would at least keep Serah from becoming a monster--and therefore not being able to help her complete it. Lots and lots of guilt and self-hatred. And she's angry at the fal'cie, and angry at Sazh (though Sazh is only voicing what a majority of the citizens of Cocoon feel)(she's mad at them, too) and focussing on that anger is easier than thinking.
The problem is that Lightning is facing a pretty bleak situation here, and there is not an easy solution. Obviously, she wants to find and save her sister, no matter what. But this is pretty clearly easier said than done, and Lightning is a very practical person -- shouting empty, optimistic promises is the sort of thing that pisses Lightning off. So she can say she will save her sister... but what is she actually supposed to do? So she just has to... focus on one part at a time-- the easy part: find her. Serah is missing, Lightning will find her. That's as far ahead as she can let herself think. Any further than that and she runs up against the truth of everything Sazh is saying -- Serah can't ever be human again; Serah might turn into a monster; Serah will live her life as a slave -- as well as the 'truth' that a l'cie is a danger to anyone around it, not only because they are clearly the enemies of Cocoon, but because they can contaminate anyone else around them, and so the military will hunt them down and remove them.
SOLUTIONS ARE KIND OF THIN ON THE GROUND. So she lashes out at the people around her and bottles up her feelings and soldiers onward.
--Effects and anger and confusion and guilt and anger! She knows more things about the world now but she's not really going to think about those things too hard, because thinking about them is too painful and difficult.
--Serah ;;
--This also puts her in an interesting position re: Emerald's developing new policy regarding death games. Because obviously she's got a lot of anger and disdain for the idea of thoughtlessly protecting yourself and sacrificing others for your own safety all of a sudden... but also it's equally balanced against the idea of ignoring difficult choices and making things easier on yourself -- which is kind of how she sees Emerald's sacrifice policy. Her refusal to give up or even entertain the idea of giving up in a hopeless situation also just got ramped up dramatically... so ultimately she's still determined to not die--she'll just. I don't know she just has so many feelings.
tl;dr: she just has so many feelings. None of them are good.